It was still early this morning, but my body woke me up on autopilot since our normal rising time is around 5 am. But today is Saturday and my mind started rolling through my to-do list and what I ought to get up and start doing. Instead I forced myself to slow down, turn down the thoughts, and go back to sleep.
Am I being a “lazy” wife by not following my husband out of bed and getting moving on our day? NO! Not today. There is a place where I do need to get up and get going – but today, knowing the day, knowing our schedule, I knew taking care of myself and giving myself an extra couple hours of sleep was the best thing I could do for my husband (and children). Because I love him, I am choosing to take care of myself so I can better serve and care for him.
This was a concept I missed realizing the importance of for many years. That concept of slowing down was of utmost importance to my being the wife (and mother) I need to be.
A few years ago I started to struggle with juggling life as a mom to many little ones and being the wife my husband needed. I began to see that concept of needing to be filled up myself in order to be able to pour myself out for those around me.
So, what does this look like? To be honest – for YOU – I have no clue. But I can share what I do for myself and perhaps it will spur you on to think about how it would relate to you and your needs.
First and foremost, making the time to spend in the Word and continuing to infuse my life and thoughts with the Word of God is incredibly important. The time spent in the Word, allowing those few minutes of peace to fill my soul, really sets the tone for my day.
Next, knowing that my husband loves me and my body the way it is – even after 6 pregnancies and the “results” of those – I know he also appreciates knowing I am caring for my body physically and doing what I can to strengthen and maintain a healthy body. Again, know that this looks different for everyone. Honestly, I am not where I want to be, but I am faithful to continue to learn about my body, to educate myself on how my body responds to various foods, and to plan my menus and meals to help me (and the rest of my family) maintain and strengthen their health through good food.
And this continues on to taking the time to exercise and build healthy moving habits – be it a more intense workout, a membership to a gym, or being intentional about walking daily or moving well in our day-to-day life. The key here is being regular and intentional. It’s the creating of a habit of being faithful and caring for your body.
I have so appreciated the ministry and workouts of Fit2B. It has impacted my life in an incredible way and has really changed my perspective on how I can care for and heal my body. For me, much of this realization impacted my mindset of intimacy and time with my husband. Though this hasn’t been an area I have struggled with to the extent that many do, it did strengthen my resolve to heal my body after pregnancies, to be able to be intimate without pain and stress.
May I encourage you, dear wife, if this is an area in which you are struggling, please look at the these resources and take the steps needed to start healing your body. God designed our bodies for enjoyment and pleasure with our husbands AND they were designed to carry those sweet babies. YES, they were also designed to heal and be whole again as well.
Next, as you look at the concept of caring for yourself and making that time for you to be filled up again, ask yourself – what rejuvenates you? What makes you happy and what brings peace to your mind and soul?
Is it beauty around you? What steps can you take to make your home, your kitchen, your bedroom, more of a space that makes you smile?
Is it getting out of the house all by yourself and enjoying some quiet time? Make plans to do the next round of grocery shopping or errands without the kids.
Is it finding space to read a good book and relax? Put the kids and hubby to bed and go take a warm bath, and enjoy some chocolate and a good book. (This is something I do alot. I have found it is an incredibly simple and cheap way for me to unwind and relax and allow myself some space to be “me” and then be able to move on to wife and mama again.)
Think through your day and start with little things that make you happy and see how they start changing your perspective on the rest of your life.
As I finish these thoughts, may I encourage you, sweet lady. Yes, you are called to be a wife and next to your relationship with God, the relationship with your husband is of utmost importance to make a priority in your everyday.
But please don’t forget that part of making him a priority and showing him honor and respect is your being intentional about making time to take care of yourself. This is not neglecting him; this is showing him that you love him. You know that your joy, happy attitude, and peaceful spirit are important, and taking the time to cultivate and maintain yourself in these areas are truly a benefit and blessing to him.
What can you do today to start improving your thoughts or actions in this area? I’d love to hear your thoughts in the comments!
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Jennifer has always had a heart for women and encouraging others in their motherhood journey. As mama to six growing and rambunctious little ones, Jennifer has her days and hands full but still manages to find time to blog, photograph and help grow the businesses she and her husband have created together. Jennifer and her family feel privileged to live in the beautiful state of Idaho, are blessed to home school, do daily life and living together and make memories together as a family. You can follow her on her blog at www.claffs.com – Don’t miss checking out the shop page there full of encouraging photo quotes for moms and others. You can also keep up with her on Facebook, Twitter or Pinterest, where she updates things as often as life allows!